Now I am like...

Tearful and melancholic..

I love my Mr. Curly so much

I don't wanna lose him

The beginning of all

It began when I casually asked my man to be serious and marry me. Did I ask him? Yes.

I kind of talked about this idea of living our life together and building a small happy family for like days, hours. As a man, he, let's call him Mr. Curly, felt the urge to do or provide what I want. Trust me, this is his worst trait ever! Why? Because even though I only talk casually and passing by, he always takes it seriously.

Anyway, because of his trait, he started to think about marriage too. He in silence, started to make a plan of where, when, and how to propose me. Well, he asked me when I wanted him to meet my parents and I told him, "just come with me on Eid holiday." He asked me too about when I wanted to get married, I told him "if it's possible, I want us to get married as soon as possible. Even tomorrow is great."

It was in 2013. He finally came visiting me and my family on the Eid day. (Eid is moslem's christmas). He even only spent 1 day with his family then flew to my town just to do what I wanted him to. 

On that day, on that very day. I still remember his face, his voice, his sitting position, his t-shirt, his smell, his smile, and his fear. There were me, my dad, my mom, and him in that living room. My dad was silence all the time. He is never used to this romance thing. My mom? She was more enthusiastic of what was about to happen. Me? I swear to God, if there was a bucket, I'd like to hide my head in it just to hide my tremendous red face, and few tear drops. Mr. Curly sat right next to me, and said 

"Mr. and Mrs. S, I'm here to ask your permission to marry your daughter. We've been together for so long and we think this is the right time to tie the knot. I know I am no body. I don't have much money. But I got my parents' permission to marry your daughter and I am ready." Pause...

"My parents said hi and being very sorry that they couldn't come. If it's alright with you, I'd like to marry your daughter on her graduation day. It's a very perfect time and special for her. I want to make the day more special for her. And if it's alright, it will be a simple wedding first then we can have the ceremony in early 2014." Another pause...

"So, what do you think?" A very awkward situation then happened.

I did really want to hug him that time! Kiss him! But, damn there were my parents staring at us, awkwardly as well. Then my mom said, "then she cannot be pregnant until the big ceremony. Otherwise, people will be curious and gossips will be in the air."

I nodded. "That we can do," said Mr. Curly.

My dad was having a very long pause. I hate that.

"Well we have got to discuss this with the rest of the family first. You know, we have a big family. And based on our tradition, we've got to discuss this with them. With her uncles, aunts, grandparents." My mom explained.

"Alright. So when can we have the confirmation?" Asked my man.

"I'll just phone you or you can phone me. Give us some time for this."

"Yea, we need to discuss this first." Finally my daddy talked! That's all and he headed to the bathroom.

Me? What about me? A very long pause too..

To be continued...

Wrong home

People said home is a place where you find peace.
I'm home right now.
I'm back to my parents' house after years leaving them.
This is supposed to be full of happiness and excitement.
This is supposed to be a home for me.

But I'm feeling different.
I'm feeling uneasy.
I'm feeling so lame.
I'm so shallow.

I feel much better back at my lodging house.
Maybe I don't feel this place as my home anymore.
Not to mention the heat, the tradition, the people.
I don't like the heat.
I don't like the complex tradition.
I don't like the people with loud voices and strong language.

It's just not me at all.
It's not me.
It's not my home.
I'm at the wrong home.

MARRIAGE

MARRIAGE.
what do we know about marriage?
two in-love people tying their knot so they won't be separated anymore?
two people finally find their bed soulmate?
two people who are sick of attending their friends' marriage and suddenly decided to get married?
two people who are meant for each other even before they were born?
two people who only need a person to help pay the bills?

what is marriage?
tradition?
obligation?

WHAT??????????

GRADUATION

If I was Bruce Willis, I'd say "Yippy Kaye MF!!"

I'm so unbelievably glad to realise that I'm no longer a student. 

I've spent so many years due to my attendance weaknesses, and so much money on this study.

I've shed so much tear just to write a whole good, well I'm not that confident to say great, thesis using Semiotics approach for 2 YEARS!!

In the end, I got A for the thesis and I got nice GPA. 

How GRREAAT GOD is!!

How GRREAAATTT MY SELF is, well I can't be stopped from being narcissistic. 

I should thank my self as well for doing great, right?

After all, I now can pronounce I'm a Bachelor of Arts and goodbye Campus..

Fresh squids

Yay! I went to the beach market in Palu, Central Celebes, and I found these fresy big squids. It was WOW! I love squids and fish so much that I couldn't control to buy them all.
Finally I bought the squids and fish, then left them to my Mom to cook. The best part about cooking the squids is the ink. Most of people might throw the ink away, but we keep it and use it in our cooks.
The ingredients are just garlic, red onion, ginger, chili, lemon juice, celery, and leek.
I'll give the full recipe on my next post.

Sunny fruit

You know how refreshing the watermelons are..

Mesjid Terapung Palu (Palu Floating Mosque)

I took some days off last weekend to go back home, Palu the central Celebes of Indonesia. I only got few time to explore the city with my boyfriend, although I got like 3 days off. We went to the boulevard where we could see and enjoy the beach. It was very windy back there but we just wanted to have fun. Then we found this one floating mosque. It's not really floating, it's just being above the water with the foundation inside the water. It got bridge for the people to get into the mosque and we had to take off our shoes in front of the gate to keep the holiness and cleanliness of the mosque. Moreover, the mosque is quite small. If it were bigger and further from the beach sore, I think it would be great.

Takoyaki

Aaa...this is one of my favorite snacks from Japan. The balls are very moist inside and the taste of the sauce is so unique that I can't stop eating them.

I curse the day Hysteria was made!

On my last holiday, I went to this amusement park in Jakarta, Dufan. I did imagine how it was going to be the greatest day of my life that I would try all kinds of games they have. Still, oh my God! I didn't have any other ideas or souls like a cat when I rode in this freaking game, toy, whatever. The point is I hate so much that I almost peed on my pants. I thought it would be so much fun but it turned out it creeped me out that I couldn't even breathe. Moreover, it made me realized that I hate being thrown away and feeling like I am about to fall.
That's why, I curse the day this very kind of thing was made!

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Look at my boyfriend there, he is such a daredevil!

Books for children

Alopecia

What is Alopecia?

It's a sudden baldness on a part of your body or head, as you can see on the picture below.

That is the condition of my head almost a month ago.

Kind of sad that I got this kind of hair-loss because it totally ruins your

appearance. No matter how you hard you hide it, it will always show up

like it doesn't like to be inside of your head.

Because I already had this before, I've started my traditional treatment since then.

I use a shampoo named "Natur" which is only available in Indonesia, I choose

the aloevera one because it helps your hair to grow. It works for me although it grows slowly

like a snail's movement. Besides that, I also use the real aloevera by applying the gel into my scalp

for 15-20 minutes before I wash my hair. So far, as you can see below, it gives me hope though that

I can have my old hair back.

ps. O yea, this hair-loss is said to happen if you are too stressed.

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A part of Bandung, West Java, Indonesia

Stylish or Not?

Well, lately I've been dressing or precisely mix-and-matching some clothes using www.looklet.com site. It is as fun as you're dressing up your selves. Besides giving us ideas to mix-match our clothes, it also helps us to satisfy our appetite for branded luxurious goods. Here are some of my creations, tell me are they stylish or not?

 

 

 it's nice for hanging around with your girls (above)

this one too, feels like going back to 70s (above)

there's no rule of banning boots at the office right? (above)

who's that mysterious seductive lady? (above)

I say, looklet is fun, you should go try it ladies.

Indonesia

WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU MY COUNTRY???

If you were a teacher, what kind of teacher would you be?

Are you going to be the mean but discipline one?

or

the kind of stupid patient clever one?

or

the smart warm and caring one?

First picture, mean teacher, you gain two things: respect and fear.

Second picture, stupid but clever, oh Man no matter how clever you are, but if you are too stupid and patient in dealing with your students 1 thing you'll surely get: disrespect.

Third picture, you'll definitely get respect from all students.

All I can say here is you can be any kind of teacher you want to be depend on the students' conditions you're facing of. This is what it's called teaching technique. As what I taught, teachers are "pretenders". It's not literally pretenders anyway. It's like for example when we are in a bad mood, we gotta hide it from our students or else we're not going to be professional. It is right though that they are just students, but first they are our customers, second it's for the sake of our own self value, third it's to build the belief among us.

For almost 1 year I've become a teacher, somehow I found myself is fond of teaching. I found it difficult at first, but the children successfully make me realized that teaching is beautiful. Anyway, it's not only about teaching but educating as well. Educating is surely difficult because we are to shape their ways of thinking, habits, manners, while teaching is slightly easy because everyone can be teachers. A robber for example, he shows someone how to rob, well that's teaching. That's why, the profession as teacher is not that we merely teach but we educate people's children and in order to do that, we gotta understand them deeply. Hard man but FUN!

Udang Bumbu Kuning

Hmm...
I actually cannot find the right name for this recipe. If there is anyone out there, especially Indonesians, who know this recipe, please do give me an insight. :)
However, this recipe is made from the previous recipe. I just omit the coconut milk and add a lemongrass.
Do the same step, but when you stir the spices, don't forget to add the lemongrass.
I also replace the beef with shrimps. It's delicious as well, even more delicious.
Go try it!

Morality vs. Democracy

Morality.
What does exactly "morality" stand for? What kind of people can we say have good morality?
Who does exactly have the right to define the good and bad morality?
None, I guess.
Morality, "a doctrine or system of moral conduct" said Merriam Webster dictionary. 
Hmm.. moral. I bet we can never define anyone's morality since we are merely human beings.
There is nothing right or wrong in this world, it's just us mark anything as bad or good.
It is even possible if something good according to us is something bad for some other people.
Just like what happens recently in Indonesia.
The morality of the people, including me, is being tested. Some people accuse them selves as the holy ones, some people against them and think they are crazy, and some other people remain calm.
Honestly, the morality issue in Indonesia bothers me a lot; yet, my friend told me not to care as long as it doesn't disrupt us. Well, it does disrupt our lives, as Muslims. Those "holy" people have made many troubles to our lives. Their actions toward anything that they think is not allowed in Islam has to be "destroyed". 
Sad, they make the name Islam gets worse day by day. They ban people, products, activities, everything they don't like. Who the hell you are??
I together with all the other liberal Muslims in Indonesia are fed up with their actions. 
Who are they? Who else, FPI of course.

I don't care about Lady Gaga's concert banning, I don't care about their ideology, but what I care the most is the peace issue. To be honest, I feel threatened by their actions. Not because I do wrong things, just because I am afraid of hatred virus. I don't want Islam is marked as "the nest of the evils". Terrorists in America and East countries are enough to make people terrified. Just don't add more terrors here in my beloved land of Indonesia. 


Somehow, I miss the moment when our late former President Soeharto  led our country. It was so peaceful and people are so discipline. We were once known as the friendliest people in the world. We once had our warm smiles. We once had respect for our Pancasila and flag. We once held "Bhineka Tunggal Ika" high up in the sky. Now? People seem to forget it. Children tend to love Korea most and forget about our values as Indonesians. We have many different races, languages, cultures. life styles that we need to respect each other. Even we regard the Chinese descendants here as Indonesians. In my opinion, Indonesian people are not ready for democracy. 

In 1998, late former President Soeharto retired from his work and it marked the start of the democracy in Indonesia. However, nothing seems to change, only the buildings and the corruption change, worse. Since that time, people seem like cats being released from their cages. People tend to do anything they want without regarding the Pancasila values. People tend to forget that they live together in this world. Still, in the democracy there is still the morality issue. Democracy is the stage where we can speak up our minds toward everything, but FPI doesn't care about it. They want to make Indonesia as an Islamic country. Well, no way. We have the Pancasila for God sake! We are different! We are not even from the same race and history. People want democracy but you speak about morality. People just want to express their ideas, you express your hatred towards their ideas. Which morality are you talking about? You say the morality is getting worse, well are you the good ones?

Where is the love now?
It's okay to spread the ideology of Islam, Christian, or any other religion; but, please consider the peace. Since I was a kid I was taught that Islam is a holy and peaceful religion. We need to prove somehow instead of forcing people to do what we want.


Let Pancasila and "Bhineka Tunggal Ika" remain in our hearts forever, for we are different from each other.

Eetlust!!

The moment during PMS makes me want to eat a LOT!
I've been dreaming of eating many kinds of foods, but lately I want fish.
I got the Mr. Fishy, it's a pack of a group of baby fish. However, I haven't cooked them until now.
They are still relaxing themselves in my fridge.
All I've cooked are beef and shrimps. I cooked them in the slight same way though.
First the beef. We call the meal "Daging Tuturuga". The spices are basically, as I know, for cooking sea turtle but since I don't eat one and I only got the beef so I tried to cook it. Here are the spices:

Turmeric (2 cm)
Pepper (1 tsp)
Salt (1 tsp)
Chili (5 pcs)
Coconut milk (100 ml)

Coconut oil (2 tbsp)

Lime leaves (2 leaves, minced)

Ginger (2 cm)

Beef (200 gr)

Garlic (2 cloves)

Red onion (2 cloves)

Hazelnut (4 cloves)

Potatoes (1, if you use the big one)

Water (500 ml)

How to cook:

• Cut the beef and potatoes into dices then put them in a bowl.
• Roast the hazelnuts for about 1 minute.
• Grind hazelnuts, ginger, turmeric, chili, onion, garlic and pepper together.
• Heat the oil on a pan, then put the seasoning that you've ground and the lime leaves.
• Stir it until it smells good, then put the beef.
• Stir the beef until it looks pale, then pour the water. Keep stirring the beef until the water is boiled.
• Pour the coconut milk and stir. Wait until it's boiled again.
• Put in the potatoes and wait until it's boiled again and the beef is soft enough.
• Serve it on a bowl.

Note: 
You can add more water if you feel the beef is not soft and well-cooked yet.

There you go, the "Daging Tuturuga". So bad that I did not take a picture of it; but, it tastes pretty good.